Protected Sex

via First Things:

Heck, let’s go out on a limb here and point out that none of these women seems to have a stable relationship with a man that has stood the test of time. So, “protected” sex doesn’t seem to do much for women in terms of encouraging long term commitments from men, and it certainly has adverse effects on career prospects. Last time I checked, the office slut was still the office slut, and promotions went to the stable women executives who honed their business acumen and accomplished strategic goals.

Fertility and sexuality are united, but often clumsily shared. Protection means providing a context for that shared gift that can handle any and all of the consequences. Contraception fails. Impotence happens. Pregnancy is not a surprise. It happens after people have sex! Or it doesn’t. In real life, the desperate housewives are usually more worried about paying the bills.

Then again, I’m old and tired, too. When people tell me I look great, I am really grateful for the compliment, because I have eight children. People joke that my husband and I don’t know how this happens, but we have one up on Hollywood. We understand how real sex gets protected.

We’ve never been truly surprised to find I am pregnant. So, we do have protected sex. We’re ready for the fruit of the conjugal bed. And our conjugal sharing goes way beyond the bed. When menses and ovulation cause physical symptoms that ruin my mood, exhaust my energy and stain my clothing, my husband is right there to commiserate with me and make sure I rest. He shows his love by tackling Mt. Laundry and baking bread every day. (Yeah, our version of protected sex gets expensive, too.)

Be sure to read the whole thing.  (Don't worry, it's not that long, and it's well worth it.)